What the hell?

You can tell by the cricket noises that this blog don't have many people knowin about it yet. Well, I'm putting posts up anyways to give anyone who happens upon something to read and comment on. ;)

I'm calling this post, “What the hell?” And that's my question. Or maybe you could rephrase it as “Why the hell?” In either case, I'm asking about why Christianity has hell in its doctrines.

I'm sure every human being in America (probably counting out at least half the toddlers) has heard something along the lines of “if you don't accept God you're going to hell!”, or, more bluntly, “you'll burn in hell for eternity if you do not accept God's grace and mercy!” I'm sure the Christians you've talked to don't phrase it like that, but it's the general idea. For the Christians who do not believe in a literal hell there's always a fundamentalist citing such a verse as Daniel 12:2, or Matthew 18:8-9, affirming that hell does exist and demanding that the church step away from such a “secularized and worldly idea” as the nonexistence of hell.

Why is this there? Well, it actually makes sense. The concept of hell comes from the same deity who would destroy all the people in a nation, babies, moms, kids, dads, soldiers, everybody, for something nation did at some point in the distant past (compare 1 Samuel 15 to Exodus 17:16, even theologians debate why God was so bitter against the Amalekites). This is also the same deity who demanded that Israel wipe out the inhabitants of several other nations so that Israel could take possession of the land. See the Dwindling in Unbelief article for other examples of this and Richard Dawkin's words regarding this: http://dwindlinginunbelief.blogspot.com/2008/12/richard-dawkins-god-of-old-testament.html

As these are attributes of God, no wonder he inserted the whole “damn” thing in the Bible. But some people say that all that was before the new testament, and you see, Jesus lets mercy enter the picture and all that. That's all quite fascinating, but it leaves us with a little bit of an issue. Why would good ole love-em-all Jesus support such a damned idea as hell?

Some examples of this violent Jesus-talk can be found in Mark 9:43-48, and Luke 16:22-24. Jesus seems just fine with this arrangement. And one cannot get past the dead-smack end of the Bible, Revelation. Jesus looks like he's about to do some kickass genocide there, even more than God ever did in the old testament. It appears this is part of a reality-show complex.

You see, it's quite simple. God created man, put Satan on the planet (as you may recall from my last post), got him evil, and booted him out of the garden for it. Then, demanding blood for being so insolent as to eat the fruit God didn't want touched, God ordered that the rest of mankind sacrifice good healthy animals to burn so God is appeased (he loves the smell). Then God sent part of himself who also happens to be his son (Jesus) to go die on the cross so God can be a sacrifice for humanity to himself so that the billions of people comprising mankind have a shot at being free of the charge Eve got them by eating the wrong fruit. Now we just have to say “I'm sorry!” and we're saved! God's reality show, complete with dramatic effects.

But if you don't, no, Jesus don't like that. Hell is what you get for not getting into a personal relationship with Jesus, because you sinned in your sinful nature that Eve got you (thanks a lot, woman). It is only just that you help pay off Eve's punishment by burning in excruciating pain for eternity.

Now to the Christian, it's a duh. Say “I'm sorry Jesus, come into my heart and fix me”, or go to hell. Hint: choose first one. But in reality, this is the most ridiculous bullshit ever. All of mankind has inherited the worst punishment ever conceivable because Eve ate the wrong fruit (again, thanks a lot). God, crazed from this act of disobedience, wants people to burn for that. But to be saved from this wrath what do you become?

A CONVERT! All you have to do is scare people into being Christians with this concept of hell and you get more people! Once you are a convert you preach the good news that you're damned unless you repent. The religion spreads. What people don't seem to think about is that this is all centered around an egocentric, malevolent, bloodthirsty, tyrannical deity that happens to have a desperate need for love. You might as well have worshiped the sun-god and given him human sacrifices, it wouldn't be as bloodthirsty. It turns out that hell is simply a scare tactic. Once people are convinced that hell is real (or want to pull Pascal's wager), they're more than willing to accept a way out. In fact, if hell DIDN'T exist, there's no way ANYONE would want to serve such a perverted deity.